Frustration, frustration, frustration!

I'm not frustrated right now... this week however has been quite trying. I feel defeated. All the little things keep going wrong and get under my skin. Now I just feel like sighing and giving up, 'cause when we mess up that's the easiest thing to do. I should not talk to certain men... even if they are a professing Christian... a double minded person is unstable in all his ways. I don't want to be that person! I've been pointing fingers and getting angry at a certain person for his unbelief, for the way he asks why instead of trusting God... now I'm mad at myself for still lusting after him... and for giving in. Stupid-face flesh, go die, you're dead, stop trying to come back and overtake me.  I honestly don't know how to feel... Jason says we shouldn't talk to each other anymore... which he says every time this happens. He's really gone off the deepend this time though and I'm at my wit's end.
Unfortunately I know that I have to stop saying I'm weak and use the strength God has given me to remove myself from being anywhere near Jason, or letting him tempt me when he's lusting after me. I have to stop myself from giving in and allowing myself to fantasize about marrying him... it's not gonna happen Mary!

The thing that sucks is it's so easy for me to go from one extreme to another... like, "God doesn't want me to have Jason so He obviously wants me to be alone and miserable for the rest of my life. I obviously don't deserve to be loved by anyone... blah, blah, blah more lies from the devil..."  Ahem. *spits in the devils face*
God wants Jason out of my life because I'm tempted and distracted by him. That's it. Nothing more... and nothing less. He helped bring me back to God sure- but he is just as steadfastly keeping me from staying near God. I need to get him out of my life. It's not anyone's fault but MINE and I have to own it, confess it, repent of it and move forward. I hate that those things which I would not do, are the very things I do. God deliver me from the body of this death!!! (Romans 7 reference) God be thanked, for Jesus Christ my Lord- He redeemed me, I just need to stop saying it's true and start living it out. Waaaaaaaaaaaay easier said than done. I'm sorry everyone, I failed all of you as well as Jesus, I pray you'll forgive me- please pray that I'll turn away from this sin for forever.