Ugh. I hate being such a stupid ambivalent person. I know that Dane didn't do anything wrong, was totally sweet and wonderful and yet, I had no peace about being with him. Now that he isn't here rubbing my shoulders and playing with me and Dominic... I feel really lonely. It was only from like, Fri to yesterday... or today really... this morning. I called him. I told him we should just be friends cuz no matter how much I keep trying to convince myself he's a good guy and i should be with him, I just, can't be.
I think I'm better off single... except that I read this article about loneliness and people... i'm in for some serious health issues. Haha... Apparently lonely people are more likely to die young.
Of course... I'm not really lonely, (thank you Kelly for pointing that out) but i feel that way every now and then. Especially after having this super sweet guy... argh. I know I made the right choice, I felt like I was just using him to get amazing back massages and someone to help me out with Dominic. Sigh.
Now I'm single, again. I guess I never really wasn't but I like to think that for a little while I was special to someone. He wasn't even mad when I said we should just be friend because I know I'm just gonna keep being ambivalent which isn't fair to him. Ok i'm gonna go eat cuz i'm starving. Yay for being single til i die!!!! Lol. Oh well, I have AWESOME FRIENDS (that'd be you gorgeous people reading this) and my beautiful little son.
No comments:
Post a Comment